fairytales gone awry {the elusive dream table}…

vogue

when i die they’ll have to eat the food from my wake off of my dining room floor, because i still won’t have a table…

in which case it will, i hope, look like this because a) everyone will want to look their absolute most fabulous in order to celebrate my life, and b) i’ll be so old before i die that all the menfolk will have perished long before, thus accounting for the all-girl congregation!

this is distinctly how it’s starting to feel…

i thought choosing dining chairs was tricky: not too uptight {i’m not grown up enough for that} & not too dilapidated {because my boyfriend, it appears, is too grown up for that}…

but after presenting several options to my better half we ‘settled’ on wishbone chairs because they’re stylish, comfty & can be dressed up or down depending on what you put with them…

i also love them because, whilst they’re distinctly scandi in their look & feel, their design is not so overbearing as to completely dictate the style of table they go with…

indeed, i’ve seen them paired with sleek modern numbers in marble, moulded plastic, glass & metal & equally i’ve witnessed them shine alongside rustic wooden slabs that look like a tree one day succumbed to the rotting of its roots & fell slap bang in the middle of a banqueting hall…

i’ve even seen them making out with a hulking behemoth of an antique table & this, after much thought, is kinda the look i was going for: either dark oak or bleached {the one-woman jury is still out}, but undeniably old…

two years later &, having searched high & low, the perfect dining table eludes me still: it’s like a drawn-out & much less romantic version of the princess & the pea as they’re all either too big or too low, too carved or too plain…

& then there was the one that got away after the ebay seller’s mother died mid-transaction & i never heard from her, nor the table, again {yes, this really happened}…

no surprise then to hear that my frustration level at this stage is now positively palpable…

& this frustration is only heightened by the fact that, after two years of dutiful ‘making do’ status, our old ikea trestle table has now been seconded by my boyfriend to act as a temporary work desk in the study until the perfect one of those falls across my path {another story for another day}…

as it turns out, this was a cunning act on my boyfriend’s part as now i spend my days staring at a blank space & four lovely wishbone chairs pitifully lined up along the dining room wall like naughty schoolboys outside the headmaster’s office awaiting the dreaded cane…

& so i succumbed: i thought ‘perfect table’ be damned, i’m going into the ebay trenches & i’m not coming out until i find me a table i can install in time for christmas dinner!

after googling “round oak table” in about fifty languages, i eventually found a victim that, although not ‘perfect’, i figured i could make work…

i even found a furniture stripping company to remove the patchy orange glaze that had somehow married itself to the table’s oak surface..

& then, in the middle of typing up my email to get a quote on the stripping process i hot footed it back to ebay to find the orange beast’s dimensions &, low & behold, it’s gone! G*O*N*E*

insert deep breathing here… & here!

& so it is, i’ve now resigned myself to the fact that i actually am destined to dine off my lap for the rest of my natural life & have a picnic for a wake…

so i guess not everybody gets their fairytale ending afterall, not even at christmas…

{ps, if anybody knows of a simple round oak dining table for sale with a thick table top & a chunky central pedestal fashioned in a simple, art deco/art nouveau style of approximately 100-110cm in diameter, please do let me know!}

image via: craven maven

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8 thoughts on “fairytales gone awry {the elusive dream table}…

  1. As someone who regularly eats on her sofa off her lap, I say dining tables are overrated 😉 But I do have my dad’s old dining table repurposed as a dining table, and I adore it more than anything else in the world. But we worked backwards with getting the table first then the chairs. So I don’t think I have any helpful advice other than to keep looking! Visit estate sales, scour ebay compulsively…and have you thought about making one? The round part would throw me off, but I’m sure there are lumber yards out there that can hook you up! Gosh, this has to be frustrating for you. Keep at it and you’ll get your dream table, I know it. Though I did crack up at you saying at your wake people will eat off the floor. 😉

  2. That’s so weird I was also on eBay this week looking for a round dining table. Not as easy as you’d think is it? All I find are gplan ones which I don’t mind as a cheap fix but the oh is having none of. All the nice tables were gustavian and four thousand pounds. Ouch. So when you one see if they have a buy one get one free offer on! X

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